Yesterday
at work, It was like any other day until, I bumped into one of my colleague - a
wonderful and amazing lady and we started conversing. The topic started with
the weather which is terrible, cold, wet etc. Then, I remembered and told about
my friend whom, I met few days ago. He had been living in Melbourne since last
ten years and thinking of relocating to his home country because, the weather
was always so bad, for 7 months in a year it is cold, windy etc. The country
where he comes from is always warm and things will be much brighter there and
more cheerful (he reckons).
Alright
Ramana, this is what it is, My good friend started talking." No one in
this world is happy by caring or changing the externals. The problem is that
the externals are always changing and it is the nature of the world. Also, what
you perceive as happiness today, basing on the external things like weather, or
a new mobile phone, the same thing tomorrow you would start hating. Today you
are cold and start to think how good it is to be a warm weather or see how terrible
this Mobile looks (after 1 year when a New Mobile is in the market.) Until and
unless, one finds his inner self and connection with the source of all joys a
person can never be happy. Just imagine, how lucky we are to be in the
situation that we are. We have a good job, an office where the temperature is
maintained at optimum level, we have warm cloths. So that, if we feel cold, we
can simply cover up with warmer clothes or drink a cup of hot coffee. Think of
all the homeless people living on the streets, without proper warm clothes or
money to buy a cup of coffee. For, example I come from a country where it is always
quite warm but, somehow I came here and decided to live here for as long as I
can, because it is more peaceful and happy place in spite of bad weather.
Whereas if you simply change the place, your body will still be the same and
after a while it will starts whinging about the weather, place, people etc.
There are some people who are always complaining and whinging about things in
life and my advice is that, never entertain them or hang around with them,
because they will drain your life energy".
I
told her, “Wow...that's amazing, quite an intense, deep, insightful, thought
provoking. Thank you very much for your amazing words of wisdom, I never
expected this from you and you really made my day”.
And,
these words had deep impression on me and I reflected on these thoughts for the
rest of the day. I suddenly remembered the words of Stephen Covey about Circles of Concern and Influence.
In
his famous book "Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" he writes
about two circles which contain our lives, the Circle of Concern and the Circle
of Influence. It is a wonderful book and I strongly encourage everyone to read
it. Stephen, talks about how we have two invisible circles. This is where we
invest our thoughts, planning, thinking, working into. There is a circle of
Concern which is basically, some people putting too much of their efforts into
things beyond their control like, National debt, Environmental issues, A meteorite
coming close to the earth, I even remember a friend who used to worry about
death. Actually, no so much of worry but, his theory was that ultimately he is
going to die and then, why bother doing anything at all in life. As you would
have sensed, this is a circle which most of us have little control.Of course, we
can always do our bit in the grand schema of things like, use bio degradable
bags instead of plastic bags, do not waste things etc. but really, we don’t
need to think whole night about these issues.
Then,
there is the circle of influence like our children, family, relatives, friends,
health, job and work place, which if you decide to do something can certain
have an influence and that’s where we should be putting our efforts and heart
into.
So,
Stephen Covey while talking about, Habit 1 which is being Proactive in life,
says that your life doesn’t just happen. Whether you know it or not, it is
carefully designed by you by the choices and decisions you make in life. He
goes on to develop the Habit 1, be Proactive in life and take responsibility
for life and stop blaming things on parents, grandparents, the nation etc.Thus,
instead of reacting to or worrying about the situations one does not have
control on, become proactive and focus your energies and efforts in the circle
of influence.
Its
interesting to note that on a different level Lord Krishna explains in Chapter
13 of Bhagavad Gita called - Kshetra Kshetrajna Vibhaga Yoga about how the
Spirit Soul is different from the body in the verse 33,
yathā
sarva-gatam sauksmyād
ākāśam
nopalipyate
sarvatrāvasthito
dehe
tathātmā
nopalipyate
TRANSLATION
The
sky, due to its subtle nature, does not mix with anything, although it is
all-pervading. Similarly, the soul situated in Brahman vision does not mix with
the body, though situated in that body.
PURPORT
The
air enters into water, mud, stool and whatever else is there; still it does not
mix with anything. Similarly, the living entity, even though situated in
varieties of bodies, is aloof from them due to his subtle nature. Therefore it
is impossible to see with the material eyes how the living entity is in contact
with this body and how he is out of it after the destruction of the body. No
one in science can ascertain this. (Translation and Purport by Srila
Prabhupada).
Again,
what this means is that on a practical, physical and spiritual levels we need
to develop, nurture and take care of our inner selves rather than being
concerned or carried away by the externals. Long time ago, I heard this story. Once, there
was a Musk deer who started running with its full strength. The reason was to
find out the source of a wonderful fragrance coming out from somewhere. So, it
was running all over the forest asking different animals and birds the source
of the fragrance and no one could tell. Sadly, the deer exerted herself so much
that she collapsed at a place and started to die when, a wise elephant came to
her and said, “O foolish deer, the smell that you are running after is nowhere
else other than coming from yourself.”
